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Fancy meeting you here

October 16, 2007

My thanks to Katie for informing me about the “blog stats” feature on WordPress. I had been using Sitemeter, but that service gives you different feedback than WordPress itself can provide.

The most fascinating thing for me to see is what search terms are bringing people to this site. Some make total sense – searchers wondering how to get a book published, if they need an agent, or searching on a specific book. Some are the result of words in the blog that mean nothing to the overall blog – for instance, a large number of people last week looking for “pot-belly girl”. After my initial alarm, I realized that term was in an entry about hyphens. However, I assure you that I am not her, so if you seek her, look elsewhere.

There is another trend that I want to address. There are a disturbing amount of people, most probably men, but to be fair, not limited to that gender, searching for “things to say to a girl.” This search term, as well as similar ones, are leading people to this site at an alarming rate – at least 5x per day. I fear….well, to be fair, I fear a number of things here. I fear for the people who need this information. I fear that they are not finding answers here. And I fear for why exactly they want this info in the first place.

So, dear blog reader who needs to know how to talk to girls, I’d like to provide you with some suggestions that might prove useful to you. First off, I’m not the typical girl. I’m an IT Girl (see header of blog). I’m the type of girl who will talk you out of the 48″ HDTV and talk you into spending a measly $300 more for the 52″ screen. I’m the type of girl who will take a conversation about a potted plant on a book cover into a 5 minute long”Bring me a shrubbery!” routine. I’m the type of girl who has a complete set of dice at home in case a quick game of D&D breaks out in the ‘hood. I’m the type of girl who is so excited to find a cool “red” shirt to wear to a Red Bulls game that she forgets it’s actually corporate swag:


Too dorky for words, I know.   As soon as I saw myself in a mirror, I bought a Red Bulls shirt, which corrected the dork infraction. 

Despite this, I believe that there are some things that all women have in common, and as such, I do feel that I can offer advice to those of you looking for advice on how to talk to girls. And my advice is this – don’t focus as much on what to say to her, focus on what *she* is saying. There’s rarely much more important for a woman than to feel like someone is listening to her. Ask her questions about her day, her job, her interests, whatever. Really listen to her responses. You’ll hopefully find yourself in a meaningful conversation in no time. What she will remember is that you cared enough to ask, which is probably the best thing that someone can say to a girl.  For even if all she did was talk about herself non-stop while you nod your head, she’ll probably remember that as a good thing.  Especially if you find yourself *not* talking about action figures, 20-sided dice, and Halo 3.

If others, male or female, geek or not, have suggestions as well, I’m open to posting them.  Let’s help our fellow Internet searchers today!

3 Comments leave one →
  1. October 17, 2007 12:07 am

    I love the stats but they are kind of alarming at the same time – vis a vis what people search to arrive at blogs. This post made me laugh. Out loud. Your advice on listening is probably the best ever as well.

  2. October 17, 2007 2:18 am

    Other good openers: “Hey, I like your shoes,” “the new hairstyle is working well,” and of course the too obvious but works every single time: “have you lost weight?”

    Any of those openers will lead to a long, long, long response from the girl, giving the guy a chance to practice those listening skills you referenced.

  3. October 17, 2007 10:06 am

    too funny! David totally told me my new hairstyle is working for me today (after the close up frame video conference.) Well, at least you got 1 guy listening – sorta.

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