Boys and Girls

On Saturday, Little IT and I took IT Boy to a Valentine’s show at our local library.  It wasn’t quite a musical, not quite a theatre presentation, but a little of both.  When Little IT was a baby and we would attend these things, she would sit politely on my lap, clap her hands in time with the music, and giggle on cue, delighting those around her.  And if you had told me I would have a second child who was the polar opposite of her, I would have laughed heartily.  No, the little kids who crawled around, screamed and generally disrupted public performances like that were simply not disciplined.  It’s the parent’s fault, you know, that their kids are running amok.

Uh huh.

I admit it.  I WAS WRONG.  Oh so wrong.  Boys are different.  The more I looked around these days, the more I see the faces of the mothers of boys trying to keep them in line and out of trouble.  When I catch the eye of one of those moms, you can see it.  We get it, and we understand what the other is going through.  Because we have BOYS and they’re different.  I say this only sort of in jest - if you’re having more than one child, you should have the boy first when you still have a measurable energy level.  Which I don’t currently have and certainly didn’t on Saturday. 

Try as both of us did, Little IT and I simply could not contain the force of nature that is IT Boy.  He was fine during the first song, which was only to lull us into a false sense of security.  As soon as the music stopped, he screamed, squirmed, and broke free of our confines to start trolling the room.  I grabbed him and pulled him back as best I could, and for at time, I was able to keep him pacing like a caged lion in the back of the room.  I held him while everyone danced, which worked for a time.  Finally, when the performers announced last song, I allowed him to go native, whereas he crawled up to the performers and sat down at their feet.  The guitarist knelt down and sang right too him, and he bubbled over with delight, before he set about dismantling her music stand.  She laughed and thanked him for helping her pack up.

Did I think about taking him out of the room?  Yes, for a second.  But here’s the thing.  It’s a free show at the library.  And if there ever was a place to try and acclimate him to these things, this was it.  He sat for 2 out of the 8 songs, which is a new record.  But it’s 1.5 songs more than last time.  And for the most part, he’s really happy to be there.  He would just rather experience the event in motion, rather than comfortably ensconced on my lap.  So, we’re going to keep going to these things and who knows, maybe we’ll find someone who encourages little boys to run around during the performance.  That will be our watershed moment for sure.

13 Shopping Days Left Till Christmas!

Here’s a great article (by way of Shelf Awareness) with quick tips for book shopping for children. 

Let me add one point to the “bring a kid to the bookstore” tip.  If you have an independent store near you, especially one that specializes in kids books, let that be your destination.  You’ll get a more varied and informed selection that you’ll find at your average chain or mega store.

There is nothing as rewarding as finding the right book for a child.  It can inspire, amaze and live longer in their hearts than any toy can. 

These Things Take Time

Remember, it’s Book Fair season in my world.  Outside of work, it’s hard to think of anything outside of books, books and books.  You could easily make the argument that my thought process outside of work isn’t much different than it is on the inside, and in some ways, you would be right.  However, there is one crucial difference.  At work, I am a “producer” and at home I am a “consumer”.  In both locations, I’m concerned about the right book going into the hands of the right customer.  At home, the stakes just happen to be higher.

Little IT has always been a book fiend.  She once went trick or treating at a co-workers house two towns away because she heard she gave out books to kids instead of candy.  She’s like I was a kid, just a voracious reader.  That’s slowing, and I am not sure what’s to blame. 

When she began coming home with homework this school year, the “reading” portion was mostly comprehension exercises in the form of the state mandated test she will be taking later in the school year.  Because the school board policy is 45 minutes of homework a night for 3rd graders, they can’t really require the 20 minutes of free choice reading that she got in 2nd grade.  As a result, she wasn’t doing it.  While she has plenty of other activities in the evening (violin and piano practice, the rest of her homework, getting her lunch ready for the next day) I still missed the 20 minutes of quiet time that she would take to read a new book.

Not liking this, I decided to kill 2 birds with 1 stone and started involving her with reading to IT Boy.  We’d pick out books, sometimes 1-2, sometimes more, depending on his ever-mercuirial toddler temperment, and alternate reading them to him.  Lately, we’ve gotten up to 5-6 books, more if he can slug down his nightly bottle of milk while we read.  I’ve even snuck in harder books, so she’s getting in more reading.

With Book Fair looming, she had a plethora of books she wanted to take home.  I decided to enter into a contract with her to insure that she put that 20 minutes, excluding the bonding time with IT Boy, into her nightly routine.  She readily agreed, and I am hoping she sticks to it. 

I’ve talked to other parents of kids in her grade, and they’ve reported similar conflicts over the reading.  I certainly understand why the teachers can’t require it, but we did suggest that their recommendation about reading come through with a bit more force.  I don’t want her to ever give up her reading.  In fact, over time I’m hoping to bring back her writing book.  I know she writes in class, but last year we had a composition book that she had to write a page in every night.  Sometimes it was nonsense (”Cassie is my best friend.  Who is my best friend?  Cassie is..”), sometimes it was a bit more deep (”Chicken nuget day at schol is most populer”*), but it was something.  She was in the habit of writing every day, and it was helping her so much in other areas of her schoolwork. 

*sic

It will be interesting talking to parents tonight at the book fair about how they are helping to keep their kids interested in reading.  What strategies do you think work for this, and what’s worked for you?